Community is a Choice

I have come to realize something over the past few weeks: community is a choice. It doesn't just "happen". Good, healthy relationships take effort and work and that is just a reality we have to accept if we want to have solid, real, relationships in our lives. I've felt like I've been in a bit of a tailspin since I got back from KC. I've thought through the idea of moving back to Missouri more times than I can count in the past two weeks, and cried many tears. I've wanted to go back for one reason: I miss my community.

Now here is reality: my "community" at Shelterwood now lives literally all over the globe. Going back to Independence is not going to give me my community back. A few of them, yes. But not all of them. And yet, I long for the deep, real, God centered relationships that I had with my coworkers and girls at the wood.

I talked with one of my newer coworkers Wednesday, and it was like God gently knocked me to my senses: I CAN have community here; IF I choose to allow it to happen. I have been fighting it hardcore since I moved here a year ago, and I feel as if God is gently revealing what this next season will look like for me: learning what true vulnerability looks like with safe people.

I've been learning in counseling the past few months what it looks like to be "real" with people but not sharing every detail about things. I've been learning what work relationships should look like vs what closer friendships should look like. And let me tell you- it's hard. For most of my life, I've been an all or nothing kinda person when it comes to relationships. I either tell you nothing, or I tell you everything. I like you, or I don't. I can work with you, or I can't. There was never really any inbetweens. And yet the more I go through life, the more I realize there needs to be more gray in my relationships instead of straight black and white.

One of my coworkers (and soon to be roommate!! :) ) texted me this morning with some much needed encouragement as a I face a situation I am dreading and has caused me much anxiety later today. I had good conversations with two of my new coworkers last night, and another good convo as I mentioned earlier. I truly believe that God is challenging my view of what community means, and giving me the opportunity to engage in a community again like I did in Missouri. I am excited to see what this next year at TDP will bring, and see how God increases my community here!!

So here is my random thought of the day for you: Are you engaging in community? Do you have people in your life who can challenge, encourage, and spur you on? I'd like to encourage you today to open up to the idea of engaging in some sort of community. Whether that means joining a small group at church, taking an art or fitness class, joining a bible study, or a book club- simply find a group that accepts you for who you are, and challenges you to be the person God created you to be.