I think this video describes my life perfectly for the past few weeks. In some ways, I feel like the lyrics were written from my prayers, Troubles chasing me again, breaking down my best defense. I'm looking, God, I'm looking for you. Weary just won't let me rest and fear is filling up my head. I'm longing, God I'm longing for you.
I skyped with my good friend Ashley last Monday and she said something to me along these lines after I told her things were not going the way they are supposed to be and I felt like I have been crying out to God for answers. She said "Marissa, they may not be going the way that you want them too, but I can promise you they are going the way God planned for them to. You will see. He's got a plan for all of this even if you can't see it right now. He is going to meet you right where you are at. You will see."
And then Thursday I went to a Kari Jobe/ Chris Tomlin concert and this was the first full song I heard Kari sing. I had never heard the entire thing until Thursday night and it was like each word spoke to my soul and God met me right where I was at. It was beautiful.
So. Since then. I have found God in the smallest parts of where I am at. It has been pretty cool to watch. He never left me, even though it felt like He did at times. He has held me and never left my side. He has been whispering in my ear the entire time, I have just been screaming and whining so loudly I couldn't hear His voice. When you allow God to meet you where you are at, even if it is at the lowest point of your life it is truly the most calming, peaceful thing I have ever experienced. I don't have to be "okay" with God anymore. I can be as mad/sad/glad/hurt/ashamed/afraid as I want and He can take it! Thats pretty legit if you ask me!
I am free to feel, free to hurt, free to be happy, free to love, free to dance. Because wherever I am at God is there, and I think I realize that for the first time in my life. It's a pretty neat thing to experience.
So. Here is my random thought of the day for you: Let God meet you where you are at. Just sit still and listen for his voice. You will find Him and He will help you. I promise. He is gonna be by your side throughout all of this.
So. Since then. I have found God in the smallest parts of where I am at. It has been pretty cool to watch. He never left me, even though it felt like He did at times. He has held me and never left my side. He has been whispering in my ear the entire time, I have just been screaming and whining so loudly I couldn't hear His voice. When you allow God to meet you where you are at, even if it is at the lowest point of your life it is truly the most calming, peaceful thing I have ever experienced. I don't have to be "okay" with God anymore. I can be as mad/sad/glad/hurt/ashamed/afraid as I want and He can take it! Thats pretty legit if you ask me!
I am free to feel, free to hurt, free to be happy, free to love, free to dance. Because wherever I am at God is there, and I think I realize that for the first time in my life. It's a pretty neat thing to experience.
So. Here is my random thought of the day for you: Let God meet you where you are at. Just sit still and listen for his voice. You will find Him and He will help you. I promise. He is gonna be by your side throughout all of this.
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