Thank You

Almost 4 years ago, I graduated from high school. A place that I grew up in, Kindergarten through twelfth grade. My high school experience was probably a little different than yours- I went to school with a lot of the same kids my entire life. In fact, here are the kindergarten "originals" as we so affectionately called ourselves

Anytime anyone would talk to me about my high school experience I would tell them that my school was like my family. The building? Like my second home. They were always there for me, always helping me grow as a person and in my relationship with Christ. And while that is still true, I realized something tonight after an unfortunate chain of events. The school itself, the structure, the leadership, the literal education? It had absolutely nothing to do with it. The reason why my high school experience was phenomenal was because of the people. Not because of the school itself. Without these amazing people using the talents God has given them, WCA is just another school. Just another building full of classrooms, filled with kids who don't really want to do the work. So I just wanted to take a minute and say thank you to some of my incredible mentors, teachers and the people who are truly my family. Without these people in my life, I can honestly say that I would not be where I am today and my faith would not be where it is today without their leadership, guidance, and love.

Mr. Zylka: I can't even begin to count the numbers of times we had such amazing conversations that truly changed my life. I remember right after you started at WCA, you couldn't remember my name and you bought me my first sub from Subway. I only hope that I can take an itty bit of the passion that you had to serve us as students and to be a Christlike role model and take that into my career to help others. You taught me sooooo many applicable life lessons that I took right to college with me and have used many times to help others. You gave us opportunities that I probably will never have again, and you gave us the ability just to be kids and enjoy life. You taught me that it is okay to make "big asks" because the worst thing that can happen is that they will tell you no! You taught me it is okay to question God, and to really learn how to trust him. You taught us all that we need to believe in our dreams, and trust that God will take us there. You have helped shape me into the person I am today and I cannot thank you enough for that. For the many snacks before soccer games from your snack drawer, your hugs and a big smile on a rough day, and simply everything. Thank you.

Mrs. Johnson: Wow. What can I say? Well first, I am so thankful that God placed you in my life when he did. Your support and love at that time in my life was what I needed in more ways than one, and the lessons I have learned through our relationship over the past few years has helped me grow in ways that I did not ever think would be possible. Thank you for the lunch talks, coffee dates, and simply a listening ear and encouragement when I needed it most. Your spirit of gentleness and calmness has been exactly what I needed in my life even though I don't think I recognized it at the time. You have taught me how to stay God centered, and how to view situations that arise from a Godly standpoint at all times. You have walked with me on a path that not many were willing to stay with me on, and for that I am forever thankful. You have challenged me, loved me, encouraged me, and pushed me. The thing I appreciate most? Is that even when the road was rough, you always had a smile for me. You always kept me focussed on God, and you never stopped loving me even when I was difficult to love at times. Thank you for being such a positive roll model in my life and for teaching me many life lessons that I will remember always.

Mrs. Garrett: Where to begin?! So many fun, fun, fun memories in your classroom! Birthday parties, kids screaming, reading, test taking, grading papers. I loved our long, deep conversations about life and how real you were about life with me. I loved how real you were with your students, and showed them on a daily basis what it means to live a Christ centered life. I greatly, greatly appreciated the days you would let me skip out for a while to go to talk to someone if I needed to, or to catch up on homework. I appreciated simply the fact that you loved me, and you treated me as if I was the most special person who walked into your classroom. And yet, I know that is how it is for every student who meets you because that is the amazing quality teacher that you are. Your love and support got me through some of the toughest times of my Junior and Senior years of high school, and I always knew that if I needed a shoulder to cry on you would be there ready with tissues and a hug. You taught me sooooooo much about working with kids of all ages, and how to see them as who God truly created them to be, and for that I am forever thankful. You encouraged me to pursue Child Life, and to follow my dreams no matter where they took me. Thank you for teaching me how to be a true Christ follower, and how to live my life for him!

Mrs. Russell: Where to begin?! You have taught me so many different things in all areas of my life ranging from class leadership to food allergies and sensitivities. You took a class that was told by so many teachers that we were bad, and impossible to work with, and turned us into a group of hard working, Christ following individuals. You showed us love, and gave us support when not many others did. You gave up personal time to spend it with us planning all of our crazy fundraisers and "Romecoming". Even after moving on from WCA you stayed apart of our lives and challenged us to try new things and to enjoy college as much as we can. You've taught me so much on how to relate to people, and how to build solid relationships personally and professionally. Thank you for all of the hard work you committed to the class of 2010, the Panera lunch dates with "The Girls" and everything else you have done for me, my friends and my family.

Mrs. Osborne: The first word I think of when I think of you is Family. You have been a support for not only me, but for Kristin, my parents, and even my extended family for as long as I have known you. You have gone above and beyond your call of duty showing love to me and everyone else in ways that you didn't have to do. You were there in times of sadness and death, and in times of new life. You were always there to chat with me, laugh with me, and even get angry with me. You never judged myself or my family for the things that we have had to go through, but have always been there to help shine light in the darkness and show us how God is still apart of every situation good or bad. You taught me how to be a responsible student, and showed me grace even when I didn't deserve it. You taught me how to love, and how to show love and forgiveness to others. You were always there to greet me with a smile and a hug, and always willing to help me out in whatever ways you could. Thank you for everything.

These are only a handful of some of the AMAZING people that God has used throughout the years at WCA. I can say without a shadow of a doubt that without these people, I would not be the person who I am today. But it's not because of them- it's because of God. He used each of their gifts and talents to change my life and I am forever grateful and thankful to him that he used them in these ways. I only wish I could find a way to show them my gratitude  as sometimes words do not seem to be enough. As the years have gone by, and continue to go by changes have come and will come to WCA. But even if the building completely falls apart, and every person I have ever known leaves and no longer works there, that will not change the impact that my time at WCA had on my life. Because it's not about the building, or the homework or textbooks or any of that. It's about the people. It's about the lives they have changed and will continue to change no matter where God places them. And so while WCA may not be to me what it used to be, these people will forever hold a special place in my heart. Thank you.

Are You a Leader or a Follower?

"Thy word is a lamp unto my feet and a light unto my path." Psalm 119:105

I will never forget the conversation I had with John Zylka, one of my teachers and mentors from high school about two days before I graduated. We were talking about how I was terrified to graduate, and truly unsure of where God was leading me. I was unsure of my decision to go to Concordia for quite a few reasons, and truly just afraid of the season before me. I talked to him about how I wished God would just give me a huge headlight so I could see all of the path before me so I wouldn't have to be afraid anymore. Then Mr. Zylka said this to me:

"Marissa, the Bible doesn't say that God's words will be a headlight to show us the whole path, it says a lamp unto our feet. He gives us just enough light to be able to keep moving forward, not so much that we can see the whole path at once, we wouldn't need him otherwise. You need to take one step in front of the other instead of trying to jump right to the finish line of the season." 

I don't know if that hits you in the same way that it hit me, but I hear that and I am just like "Wow." No wonder I keep falling down, I am trying to run through this season so fast I am tripping over everything in my path because I am refusing to walk with God and let him light my path as we slowly walk through the darkness. I keep forgetting that I will get through the darkness, I just have to walk with the light of lights in order to get there. 

I had a moment of panic yesterday. My cellphone is no more. Completely dead. I got so angry at God, thinking "Are you serious?! Why are you throwing another rock in my path?! Thats not fair!" But heres the thing- God always knew that "rock" was going to be there, that I was going to struggle and trip and fall because of not having a phone for a few days. But here is where the light comes in- Because of my dead phone, I realized how stressed out I am right now. And I took the afternoon off work to come sit at Starbucks and catch up on my work for school, and simply have some God time. 

I had run ahead into the darkness, alone with no flashlight. And I tripped and I fell hard. And so now, I am stopping and taking a moment to say again "God, I need some light on this path. Tripping and falling every 10 feet isn't working out so well. Can I do it? Yes. I could. I could do it without him. But quoting another mentor of mine "Yes, you could do it, but at what cost?" I could do it, but get more "cuts, bruises, and scrapes" along the way. So here I am. Taking a step to stop and have God come meet me where I am and choosing to walk this path with him again. Am I saying that I ever stopped following God? Heck no. He never left me, and I never left Him. I knew he was always there with me, I just wasn't letting him be my guide. I was being a leader instead of a follower. Jesus didn't tell me to "lead my life and he would follow". No. He said "Come and follow me." Not vice versa. 

So here is my random thought of the day for you: Are you a leader or a follower? Probably a little of both. But here is my challenge for you today; Let him lead you. Step down. Get outta the drivers seat. Let him be in control. Let him be the lamp unto your feet and stop begging for a headlight. Take today for today and stop worrying about tomorrow. It's a rough pill to swallow, I get it. But try it. Trust me. 

We can trust our God-He knows what He's doing.

I just heard this song for the first time yesterday evening, and I just felt that it said everything I have needed to hear for the past week or so. With everything that has been going on, I have said many times "Where is God?! How could he have let this happen?!" I was just talking to my mom last night and she said something along the lines of "Why would God send Lonnie on this journey only to have him not end up being able to do ministry? I just don't get it." And then I went to Lonnie's memorial service in Grand Rapids today, and I thought that the minister summarized it very well. He said:

"God didn't tell us that we need to understand what he was doing, we just need to trust Him." 

I have thought about this a lot over the past few days, what if God sent Lonnie to Concordia so that they could meet all these people who would become their family so that when this struggle, and this battle came they would have people to help them fight? What if God sent Lonnie to Concordia so that he could teach lessons to hundreds of people through his story? When we first look at the story, all we see is the pain, the fight, the struggle. But God did have a master plan throughout all of this. He was with us then, is now, and will be forever. He will never leave us, and he never left Amy and Lonnie. He has a plan, and even though we may not see it in entirety now, when we get to heaven and see the big picture our minds will be blown. 

I thought of another thing last night: This is just a chapter. Cancer was just part of Lonnie's story, it wasn't the entire thing. I think sometimes we get so wrapped up in parts of our lives that we forget that it is only a small sliver of our story, of our testimony. And, all stories have hard/bad parts. Even Jesus life wasn't a field of daises. He was born in a barn, mocked and ridiculed his entire life until he was brutally murdered on a cross. But then: He was reunited with God, his father in heaven. Just like we will be.

So here is my random thought of the day for you: Trust God. He knows what he is doing. Things may be rough right now, but he hasn't left you. This is just a scene in your movie, a chapter in your story that may seem awful right now, but I promise it will lead to a beautiful ending: Heaven. So don't get discouraged, don't let life take you down. It's only a season, and it will too come to pass. 

Well Done My Good and Faithful Servant

I have had the privilege of spending time with this amazing family over the past few weeks, and gotten to know them better than I had previous to this summer. The one graduating is Lonnie, and their story is incredible. Lonnie and his wife Amy moved here a few years ago from the Grand Rapids area, literally selling everything from their house and downsizing to a dorm suite so that Lonnie could pursue his dream of getting a degree in youth ministry. 

I first met Lonnie when I was a freshman in college and he worked for our maintenance department. I always seemed to have something wrong with my dorm- whether it be lights, drain not working, ants or whatever. Lonnie always got assigned to my maintenance requests. After two different times of coming early in the morning, he discovered that I was not a morning person, and was usually not awake enough or coherent enough when he showed up at my door at 8 am needing an explanation of what the problem in my suite was. After that, anytime he had to do work in our suite he would always try to tell me the day before so that I wouldn't be caught off guard and cranky when he got there early the next morning. I appreciated that so much, and I never got to tell him that. 

I will never forget February 1st, 2012. We had a required all Family Life student meeting and we were given the news: Lonnie had cancer, and it was bad. We were all in shock, but Lonnie was ready to fight and so were we. Over the next year we did fundraisers, had weekly prayer meetings, and tried to be a support for this amazing Christ follower and his family as much as we could. His strength, his faith, his life, amazes me still. Here he was, after going through chemo, determined to get to class no matter how he felt. Determined to take tests even if he could barely stay awake, passionate beyond belief for what God called him to learn. I watched all of this as I struggled to get my butt out of bed for my 9am classes and wondered how Lonnie had such strength even throughout all that he was facing. His answer: Christ. Without Jesus, we are nothing and I couldn't agree with him more. 

On May 19th, 2013 Lonnie accomplished his one and only goal: Graduation. I bawled like a baby cheering as loudly as I could as he walked across the stage. He did it, through God's help he did it. And then, things took a turn for the worse. Since I am living on campus for the summer, I had the privilege of taking care of Lonnie's four grandkids  They are precious beyond all reason and it absolutely breaks my heart that they will not get a chance to know their grandpa when they are older. I also got to meet his daughters Lucianne and Elise, and spend some time with his wife Amy. I finally felt like I could give back to this family that has blessed me in ways that they do not even realize. Finally, on June 1st, Lonnie left us to go join his heavenly father in paradise. 

My heart is broken for this family. But while we long for Lonnie to still be with us here on earth, he is rejoicing and no longer suffering in heaven with our heavenly Father. Today, the sermon at the church I was at was on 2 Timothy 4:6-8, talking about finishing the race of life well and living for Christ. Lonnie, you were a prime example of running the race well. You persevered through so many trials and gave all the glory to God every single step of the journey. The love and care you have shown to this campus will never be forgotten. I only wish that I had gotten a chance to tell you what an impact you have had on my life in person, but I know that someday we will be reunited in heaven and I can tell you then. We love you Lonnie, and you will forever be in our hearts and minds and your passion for God's work will inspire us to do our jobs as Family Life Workers to a whole new level. Rest in Peace Lonnie, You are home free.